Grief at 2.00am. The Power of the Written Word

By July 5, 2017Grief and Loss
grief 2.00am


Unless you have experienced grief, it is hard to imagine how incredibly painful, emotionally draining and gut wrenching your life can be.  Sleep is the only thing that gives your heart a reprieve from the emotional roller coaster…… well, maybe not.

You wake up at 2.00am and feel all the emotions flooding your heart again. You would really love to talk to someone but who would appreciate being woken up at 2.00am?

Sleep does let your heart have a well needed rest but the brain is still active enough.  You feel so alone, so desperately lost. So, what do you do at 2.00am in the morning?

Write…..more writing…….and more writing. Expressing your thoughts on paper is a safe place. Even though the paper can’t empathise with you, it allows you to search, find and express. It allows the paper to take on your feelings. You are able to externalize how you are feeling.

The beauty of writing everything down is that you can communicate exactly what you are going through. I know. I realized many years ago, I had a knack for expressing myself through the written word. You see I am a reflective writer. Combining this with my experience, skills and academic knowledge, I decided to provide an avenue for anyone, anywhere, anytime, to converse with a counsellor when it suited them and not the counsellor.

I put my heart and soul into my writing. I knew that if I could transfer this to my counselling then I would have something really special to offer via email counselling. This is how PV Counselling evolved.  Written words stay with you.

You get to keep this experience that you can go back to time and time again. You build a distant relationship that is personal between you and the counsellor. Distance or anonymity are not an issue because that connection has been made.

There are so many things I truly love about email counselling. I can take my time in the response I give back to you because I am not limited to a 1 hour session. I can read and reread your thoughts.  You have given me insight by the way you express yourself, your grammar, your sentence length and word choice, just to name a few. Any emoticons, I read it all.

When you write your feelings, you avail yourself to openness and honesty. You peel away the layers. When I respond to you, I become part of your journey bringing with me knowledge, experience, honesty and integrity.

I have read your thoughts, most likely shed a tear for you and emailed back from my heart to yours.

It’s not possible to hold onto verbal communication word for word over a period of time. However, it is possible to keep those written words to help you get through the next 2.00am when you wake up crying, fearing the loneliness and emptiness.


There is a lot to be said for verbal communication. But, let us not underestimate the power of the written word.


pamelaI am an accredited Social Worker and Counsellor, and a member of the AASW.  My passion is about providing a unique service for anyone, anywhere, anytime.
If you need help or any assistance, you can Contact Me Now via my website or through start an email session now  

Pamela Vandersande
BSW, Dip. Couns.